This Is How You Do It, Ladies.

This fellow on Reddit believes he has been betrayed:

Two years ago my girlfriend and I had a small DV incident where I hit her. It was wrong of me. I completely owned it and apologized. I was incensed about something I found on her phone but that is absolutely not excuse. She left for a few days but didn’t call the cops. She eventually came back home. We finished out our lease and things were fine. We even moved to a better apartment earlier this year with the same landlord. My girlfriend insisted on handling the lease and making all the payments on everything, which is fine. I gave her the money for my half of the bills and keep asking her when I needed to sign the lease with her. She said there was no need and that the landlord hadn’t required it.

We were given permission to change the locks because the last tenant hadn’t returned a key. I was suppose to help coordinate that but my girlfriend offered to schedule the appointment with the landlord’s guy that was suppose to do that.

Things were fine in our new place for a few months but recently we have had a few spats. Nothing like two years ago. I never hit her again.

This morning when I left for work, everything seemed fine but I got a call from a lawyer friend of hers informing me that I had 45 days to move out of the apartment. I try to call her and can’t. I’m blocked on her phone. I leave work and go home and find her car gone and all her stuff gone. I call the landlord and he tells me that he had no idea I was living there, the lease is under her name only, only she signed it. He says that he isn’t my landlord, she is and I need to talk to her.

The commenters on the Reddit thread most kindly explain to this individual what is going on. To summarize:

  • He invaded her privacy.
  • He physically abused her.
  • She gave him a second chance.
  • She remained justifiably wary.
  • She created an exit strategy.
  • He got violent again.
  • She got out.

Notice that her exit strategy was quiet, legal, and precluded the danger of further violence toward her person or her property.

It is hardly possible to handle an abuser better than this.


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Comments (1)

  1. cathy


    Yay for her. If only I’d been as smart. My landlord required him to be on the lease tho. Lucky her.

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